‘Cockneys Vs Zombies’ Review

Cockneys Versus Zombies

“It’s not f@cking Roman, you muppet!”

You gotta love a movie with heart.  And brains, lots of brains, most of which end up exploding from someone’s skull at some point.

“Cockneys Vs. Zombies” is the first newfangled zombie film I felt introduced the walking dead in a fresh and interesting manner.  It also begs for a sequel (or perhaps a prequel).  Second off, there’s a character named Damas!  I have an Uncle Damas, and I have never known another person–in reality or otherwise–who shared the name.

He’s eaten by a zombie early on, but still.

And if that’s wasn’t enough, Honor Blackman is in this movie!

Honor Blackman!  An Avenger before the gorgeous Diana Rigg (though interestingly, both were Bond girls) was even an idea in the producers’ eye.

That she pops up in a right decent zombie film is reason enough to like this movie.

And to be clear, these zombies are facing Cockneys, working-class Londoners from the East End, who will tolerate no shite.  These aren’t the proper, cultured Brits from “Upstairs, Downstairs.”

The zombie plague begins at a construction site, and spreads outward, where some somewhat incompetent criminals are planning a bank robbery. Two of them, Terry (Rasmus Hardiker) and Andy (Harry Treadaway) are doing it to save their grandparents from being shipped to a rest home far away.  The motley crew ends up trapped in the bank, the police alerted by silent alarm, when the shite hits the fan.

The zombies attack the very same rest home that Terry and Andy were robbing a bank to save, which means that they have to do what they can to save their grandparents.  It goes without saying that Blackman displays some of the skills that made her so valuable to Steed (an “Avengers” reference, not the Marvel one nor the mediocre remake with Ralph Fiennes and Uma Thurman).

I also like to mention that’s it’s refreshing to see a zombie film that people acknowledge that that rotting thing chasing them is actually dead, without debate, discussion or analysis.

Plus there’s a scene where one of the thieves punts a zombified baby, which is always interesting.

More awesome details abound.  For instance, where the zombies appear, rats flee because they don’t want to be eaten.  It makes a lot of sense, and it surprises me that haven’t seen it in any other movie prior.

“Cockneys Vs. Zombies has got to be one of the worse titles for a horror film ever, though luckily it more than makes up for it by being a fun, violent jaunt through London.

“Cockneys and Zombies” is currently airing on Netflix.

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