Yesterday the trailer for Zach Snyder’s Justice League – Yes, that’s the title – dropped yesterday as a part of DC’s Fandome event and I have beef with it.

For a start, if you take a look at the poster you’ll see that ‘Zach Snyder’ is bigger than ‘Justice League,’ which is problematic for all sorts of reasons.

And if you investigate further you’ll learn that this thing is FOUR HOURS LONG!

FOUR HOURS.

Now, it’s also being aired over four days but if can someone tell me why it’s so long I’d really appreciate it.

Like the poster implies this is less a movie than a huge vanity project on the part of Zach Snyder, aided and abetted by HBO Max, who probably think that it will result on a subscriber bonanza for their streaming service.

Because like context, content is king.

Though I think it’s a bad bet because the #ReleaseTheSnyderCut phenomenon has always been a fringe movement, the result of a very vocal, but very small, bunch of people.

Which is why suspect subscriptions to HBO Max will experience a small ‘bump’ that last around a month – long enough to watch Snyder’s four hour wankfest – then fall off.

Which isn’t to say that I hate the idea of it, in and of itself.

My problem is that Zach Snyder is a terrible storyteller. He has a great visual sense – and would probably be an awesome cinematographer – but as a person who has to keep all the plates aloft at the same time – he’s just not that guy.

By way of illustration, I’ve seen relatively few “unwatchable” movies, but Snyder’s Sucker Punch has to rank among them. I’ve tried to watch it – and might again – but at this point it’s next to unwatchable.

And I don’t expect “Zach Snyder’s’ Justice League” to be any different.