Either way, I lose (probably).

I just noticed that there’s a new horror movie, “Zombie Massacre,” on Netflix.  It’s directed by Uwe Boll – no matter what you think about his films, you have to admit that he’s makes a lot of ’em.  You’d think just by the sheer number, he’s directed 30 and produced 43, that he would get better for no other reason than he’s so damned prolific – and Marco Ristori.

Boll is somewhat familiar to me – I saw “Alone In The Dark” around the time it was released in 2005 and I still haven’t recovered.  I also saw another of his films, “Rampage,” and have to admit that it wasn’t terrible.  Sure, it wasn’t that good either, but it didn’t make me go into a mental fetal position, so there’s that – though Marco Ristori isn’t.

I  am hoping that he can somehow balance out – kind of like chasing a shot of tequila with a cold Heineken.  It softens the edge a bit – some of Boll’s more irritating tendencies.

I could find only one ‘Marco Ristori’ on IMDB.  And while he doesn’t have “Zombie Massacre” listed under his credits (at least not under those he directed, at any rate) a trailer for the movie does show up on his page.

Here’s the trailer, so that you to can share – at least a little – in what will probably be a very unsettling experience (for me)

I have seen the trailer, and my first question is, beyond the way that most shots seems staged and remarkably non-spontaneous – sure it isn’t spontaneous, it’s a movie.  That being said, it’s not supposed to look like it’s a movie – and that they seems to have re-used the ‘Nemesis’ from a P.W. Anderson ‘Resident Evil’ movie, who’s ‘Luca Boni?’

Is that a pseudonym for Uwe Boll, who only appears as a producer?

I don’t know, though I expect the movie to culminate in some serious Deep Hurting.