‘Stitches’ Review


“Stitches” is worth seeing, but–other than the gore effects–there’s not much going on.”

I have never quite understood why people find clowns particularly threatening (though I perfectly understand why mimes, their evil cousins, might makes some uneasy), which isn’t the same as the phobia known as coulrophobia.

I mean they’re hardly subtle, and wearing those humongous shoes it’s not like they can run particularly fast (though what they lack in speed they makeup for by the number of them that can fit in a compact car).  They also seem to make all sorts of odd sounds, so stealth isn’t an option.

So why are some (other than the phobic) bothered by them?  I think it comes down to trust.  They make many, including myself, a bit uneasy.  Part of that is due to, I think, the way the person underneath the greasepaint and garish clothing is obscured.

And speaking of clowns, in movies they occupy an interesting niche that is richer than one would think at first glance.  From everything to dramedy, “Shakes The Clown,” to the demonic–think ‘Pennywise’ from Stephen King’s “IT” and even the alien, as in “Killer Clowns From Outer Space” clowns play a role.

There are other examples, though those most easily come to mind.  The antagonist of “Stitches” is an epynonomously-named clown, who’s undead, raised by mysterious magics.  Ross Noble plays the title character, a not-very-good-clown who’s next job is at a children’s birthday party, which goes horrifically wrong.

And that’s the greatest problem with Stitches: he was never that good a clown.  If the writers had taken the character a bit more seriously, his death would have hit harder, and his reanimation would have been much creepier, as well as funnier.

As it stands, he’s more like a less-interesting Freddy Kruger.

“Stitches” is worth seeing, but–other than the gore effects–there’s not much going on.


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