When I heard that Uwe Boll is considered by many to be one of the worse directors ever (though he deserves credit for an ability to somehow secure funding, seemingly despite himself) I didn’t believe because, while hyperbole isn’t exactly unknown among bloggers, I wanted to give him a chance.

Then I saw “Alone In The Dark,” and realized that they were right.

For some reason, perhaps because of conditioning, I am able to accept Nazis in films if they speak with British accents, despite that British and German accents are by no means alike.  Though, if you’re going to cast primarily American actors, in a film that supposedly takes place in Germany, you’ve pretty much thrown the most basic sort of authenticity out of the window.

That being said, not everything about this movie is bad (most, but not everything).  Brendan Fletcher brings an intensity to his role as a Jewish resistance fighter that acquits the actor admirably, despite the weakness of the material he’s working with.  The same goes for Clint Howard (brother of director Ron Howard) who plays a Nazi mad scientist with only a sprinkling of camp, as opposed to the moundfull that he traditionally brings.

There’s also a softcore lesbian scene midway, which reminded me that Boll, as a director, cannot film  a sex scene–whether it’s hetero or homosexual–with anything approaching honesty, respect for the participants, or even the suggestion of titillation.

When all is said and done, “Bloodrayne: The Third Reich” isn’t a terribly entertaining film, and frankly not worth the time it would take you to sit through it, though if there were more vampiric Adolf Hitler dream sequences it would have at least been interesting in a bizarre sort of way.